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“Don’t get me flowers for Mother’s Day…or I will be pissed.”

“Do me a favor…Don’t get me flowers under any circumstances or I will be pissed.”

I sent this text to my husband the other day.  I was referring to Mother’s Day.  The holiday that creeps around every year like the rest of them, you know…Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Grandparent’s day, etc.  This day has always been a sense of soreness for me.  Until I decided to stop hiding my feelings about what this day truly means, at least for me.  I have hid my feelings for a rather long time.  I mean, how could I not when we live in a society where we are taught to contain, hold back, shushed, and looked at as ‘bad’ if we are too loud, exuberant or colorful to say the least.  I have a neighbor, who’s son went to school dressed in the most amazing and beautiful colored costumes on all the fun holidays.  He was eccentric and encouraged to be so by his parents.  They wanted him to express himself and be free to be himself.  It was deemed as ‘cute’ when he was younger in elementary school.  But then when he moved onto middle school he began to be categorized and slandered for his harmless expression of himself.  It made me sick to think that as children bullied him for being himself the faculty supported this notion by telling the mom one day, “Well, if he is going to be ‘that way’ he as to be able to take the comments that other’s say to him.  I mean, he is different, and if he wants to be different, he must be able to ‘take’ the comments of other children.”  This was an administration member of the local middle school explaining this to the mom of the boy who had gone to school wildly dressed that day in celebration of yet another holiday and received slandering comments from the children.  The mom found out about this, and like many mothers, called the school to inform them of what had happened. 

Humph.  I think to myself.  “If he wants to be different, he must be able to ‘take’ the comments of other children.”  We actually believe this stuff!?  We actually still believe in our 2020 society that if we want to be different we have to be able to secretly ‘take’ the rolling eyes, the whispers of slander, and the note passing that goes on day to day in our schools today.  Bullying is no longer out right hitting and destroying your personal items.  No, it has become a secret society that hides out of their own fears and desperations and jealousies of wanting to be different but never being able to take the plunge out of fear of being caught or unaccepted by the rest of society.  We have accepted this as the new normal.  It’s heart breaking.  Some of you may shake your heads in denial that this is not what is still going on today.  But I encourage you to talk to your kids.  I mean, really talk to your kids. Spend time with them asking them deep questions.  Not the surface kinds that ask… “How was school today” when they walk in the door which offers virtually nothing but a ‘fine’ before they scatter off to their rooms.  No, find the time on a walk, while they sit on the couch, or that off beat time that isn’t plannable.  I encourage you to take the moments that present themselves to you in any varying ways and dig deep with questions such as, “Tell me about what it’s like to be at school during the day.”  “Tell me how it is when you want to talk to a friend or join in on a conversation, but it may feel awkward or uninviting.”  “What does it feel like to have to raise your hand in class or to be called on by the teacher unexpectedly.”  “Has that ever happened to you?  Has this happened to anyone else?  What was it like?” 

I encourage you to ask deep questions that encourage conversation about things that they know are happening but don’t know how to tell anyone.  Because I promise you that one of these questions will open the door to a knowing within them that wants to be expressed but they don’t know how to do that because most of us truly just don’t want to know anyway.  When we find out… I promise you will be surprised at what really goes on, still. 

So, I sent this text to my husband because I really did NOT want anything for Mother’s Day.  Not because I was boycotting the day all together but because I had, had enough of the celebratory ‘feel’ of a day that means nothing to me.  Now, I am sharing my perspective.  I am not trying to change the world here.  What I am doing is sharing what is true for me… 

I never understood Mother’s Day.  I never understood this whole idea of celebrating something that clearly many of us just don’t know how to do anyway.  When I became a mother, it was like a raw slap in the face where the burn and red-handed mark lasted for days, months, and years.  It was as if someone painted this glorious picture of what motherhood should be like…it was a glorious land that when you arrived you would never turn away from it again.  You would want to stay here forever amongst that lush green landscape, carnival colored flowers just bursting everywhere you looked, birds flying, and rainbow covered sky.  It was anticipated as the best event of your life besides for marriage.  We had parties and showers to celebrate the incoming child that was going to light up our life.  We received gift after gift into this new magical land that would help us manage our new bundle of joy as we learned and carefully took on our new responsibilities of bathing, feeding and loving this incredible gift from God.  Oh, what we do to paint a Never Never Land that we will never want to return from. 

Me, I wanted to return.  When I got to Never Land… I wanted to march right out of there and run the other way.  No!  This is not what I paid for….I want my ticket back!  It wasn’t because I didn’t love my child….I did…I actually never felt a love for someone like I felt when my children were born.  It was that no one told me the real hard true facts of motherhood.  No one sat me down and told me that it was going to be one of the hardest things you will ever do and there is no way to do it right.  If someone said,

“Jennifer I have a ticket to another land that is more beautiful and amazing than any place you have ever been before.  You will go there and discover parts of yourself that you never knew existed.  Parts of yourself that will bring you joy and elation and parts of you that will bring desperation and depression.  If someone had told me it’s a transformative land and one that you will never return from the same again.  This is a land where the journey never ends and will never take you to a perceived destination.  You will constantly be learning, constantly growing, and it will feel awful, most of the time because you will never think that you are doing it right. The journey will go on forever in this new land and the lessons will be hard mostly because growing requires a lot of energy.  The truest most wonderful thing about this land is that you will never be the same and you will always be expected to do things that are outside your comfort zone.  You will have to be something that you are not ready to become.” 

 I would ask them, “Why would I pay for that?” and walk away. 

Yep, that was me at the time I had kids.  I had no clue what motherhood really was.  Nothing out there showed me that.  I had a mom that bucked out and died of cancer when I was 16.  Not because she was a victim of a disease but because life was just too hard.  This mom thing was a false idea that had been planted into her at an early age as well.  She embarked on the same journey and failed miserably.  Because she did not have the skills to rise above all the complications in her life.   

And then I had a representation in society that painted a picture of motherhood that seemed like the destination that I wanted to have.  You know, the “Leave it to Beaver” mom with the perfectly curled short hair, white shiny pearls around her neck, the freshly pressed dress that was starch white, and pointed heeled shoes she wore all day long! Ouch! She made being a mom look so wonderful!  Always cheerful, always knowing, always monotone with worldly advice for her young ones.  She was taken care of by her husband who would go to work everyday and provide a stable environment of trust and acceptance for the entire family.  I actually thought that that was FAMILY!  That I wanted that!  I wanted to fit into a mold that was what society painted it be… a fantastical fantasy life that was so far from what is true and reverent to life that we have felt like that we can never be or live up to this standard because this standard is impossible!

Sadly, I had no idea.  No idea.  I grew up in a dauntingly chaotic household where the police coming to my house once a week to break up a raging fight by my mother and father and brother made just way too much noise for the neighbors.  Thankfully, their calls, and my dad being taken away by the police actually gave us peace week in and week out.  I remember trying to get our dog, Corky, to go out and distract them because I wanted them desperately to stop fighting.  I tried myself, but I was relentlessly pushed away and sent to my room with a single handed push like I was a pebble shot away by an index finger across the room while they continued their brawl. 

But, I wanted this… a normal family.  I had no idea what normal was. 

Fast forward many years later… I have three kids and an amazing husband who loves me.  Loves me so much that I can say to him… “Don’t get me flowers or I’ll be pissed.”  Why would I say such a thing?  Because I am tired of falling into the Mother’s Day trap.  Where kids and husbands feel pressured to do something nice for their mothers without for a second asking themselves why do they actually do this?  I’ll never forget my husband coming to me year after year telling me, “Mother’s Day is this weekend and if you are going to the store can you pick up some cards for my mom?”  Amazing that he would think of this on Wednesday and then we would have to Fed Ex Mother’s Day cards to his mom to get there by Saturday. Again. Year after year. Why?  Because if his mom did not receive something that showed that her boy cared she would be forever hurt and just hurt enough that his dad would call to tell him so.  Oh, the pressure.

The pressure to do something just because it was expected.  This to me just does not make any sense.  I loved the little hand made gifts that my children used to give me when they were in elementary school and the teacher would spend the time to help each child create something for mother’s day and the child would run home eager to just give mom their gift without the understanding they have to wait until Sunday.  I loved that!  No pressure and no expectation…they just wanted to celebrate mom no matter what day it was.  I did this too. 

As they got older, the pressure to perform remained the same but the intensity just unconsciously elevated itself because now they were expected to come up with something on their own.  Even if someone went our and hand picked a card for them so that they would have to write a note to mom or grandma without understanding why they were being forced to do this in the first place. 

I can imagine what may be going on in my kids minds today if they were to actually write what they really are thinking, “Thanks mom for birthing me.  Although you didn’t have to do it, you did it anyway.  Thanks for everything you do for me even though I can’t recall what that was… oh yay, driving me to practice and such.  Oh, and have a good day.”

 They’d ask themselves afterward… “Did I do that right?  Do I pass the test? Gosh, I hope what I wrote is ok.”

Yep…that’s it… they really don’t get it… and either do I. 

So I put a stop to it…for me anyway.  I have officially boycotted Mother’s Day.  Not because I am angry…ok well, maybe I am mildly annoyed with the whole thing. 

Like, the holiday was invented in the later 1850’s not because someone decided to invent a day to celebrate Mothers, not as a day to celebrate one’s own mother, but as days of service to help out other mothers who were less fortunate band together to help teach them hygiene practices to take care for their children and keep them from getting sick.  This was a ‘work day of days’ for mothers to help other mothers. A Mother’s Day Work Club, none the less. (TIME Mag. The Surprising Sad Origins of Mother’s Day, https://time.com/4771354/mothers-day-history-origins/ )

Or that the Mother’s Day theme of staying home with your children was really emphasized as a last stitched effort to push back on the 20th century Women’s movement that wanted to get out into the world to work and make a living. 

So, for me, Mother’s Day is a choice.  Do I really want to celebrate Mother’s Day?  No.  Because we already are who we are either by conscious or unconscious choices that we have made in our life.  Mother’s Day has become the largest grossing holiday next to Christmas.  Why?  An effort to sensationalize something that just isn’t true.  We are not meant to be the version of ourselves that is painted in all those commercials.  I won’t even get into the religious version of mother hood.  That just opens a whole other can of worms that can’t even be discussed in this short essay. (Oh! And I can hear the back lash now!)

I will say this… I do celebrate mothers who realize they have become the most truest and most deepest part of themselves not because of anything that they have seen or heard on tv, Instagram, or Facebook, BUT in spite of it.  

So on mother’s day…I have decided instead to remind my kids of this… to courageously be the most truest and deepest part of themselves as much as possible… and then maybe I will have consciously come upon the true meaning of being a mother. For Mother’s Day I instead wrote them this…

Dear Ethan, Aiden, and Nora,

You have heard me say that I don’t want cards, flowers, or gifts for Mother’s Day.  Actually, you heard me tell dad that I would be pissed if you or anyone else did this for me today.  You may be wondering, Why?  Well…I thought about it and decided I wanted you to know this…Mother’s Day is a celebration of women coming together to celebrate the enormous process of raising children.  Yes you.  I would never trade this choice in for anything else…although as you know I sure do act like I don’t want to be a mother at times.  I don’t want you to learn through an expectation that sets you up for buying me something or making me something on a day that we are supposed to celebrate just because everyone else is doing it.  You know our family is not typical which is what we need to celebrate and what we need to learn to do more of as much as possible.  I don’t ever want anything from the three of you.  Not because I am a martyr or a victim.  No.  Because I want you to know the truest part of being a mother.  It is not the gifts or the cards or the flowers.  It was a choice that I made a long time ago to be and do something that has brought me to a life with you today.  TOGETHER we have created something beautiful.  I did not do this alone. WE have created a family that I never had.  WE have created a place in my heart that grows enormously with each passing year and all the wins and losses that come out of it as WE work together to make something of this world that can be anything that WE want it to be. 

Which brings me to my next point…. I don’t want you to buy me or make anything for me because I already know that you appreciate me.  I know this because you get upset when I don’t do the normal things, like wake you up in the morning when I get too busy.  When I don’t have time to make dinner, you miss it.  When I don’t have time to do the laundry, you wonder where are my clean clothes?  You miss the normalcy that you were used to.  I see that.  I see how you value and appreciate through the losses you endure as we all shift and grow and create new states of normal within our family.  I will always be your mother but I never want you to ever think that you should be like me.  Not for a minute.  I want you to be anything but me.  In fact, I want to encourage you to do nothing like I did and marry no one like me if you even choose to get married.  I want you to do so many things in your life that if you take your whole life figuring our what you want to do when you grow up that I will know that I did my job to the truest that I could have ever done.  I want you to be thinking so outside the normal that you look at others and wonder why they do things the same way that they do all the time.  I want you to wonder about everything.  And above all else… be yourself.  I want you to be so outside of yourself that through you being the version of you that is so insanely different from me that you inspire me to be more of myself.  I want you to not follow the same path as everyone else… I want you to bulldoze your own path.  That takes effort, responsibility, and a desire to create an abnormal life.  I want you to know I love abnormal and god knows you know that I love it when we ask, “Why the Fuck do we always do this, this way?” and then we don’t.  Because we have figured out that its not the path we want to take.  I want you to never be like me or anyone else.  I want you to turn away form the normal that you see on Facebook, Instagram, snap chat and certainly at school.  And I want you to buck the norm.  I want you to investigate, inquire, retreat, and come out always pushing the normal box over.  I want you to be everything like you.  And then I want you to teach me to be more of myself by you doing what abnormal does.  Nothing like anyone else. 

I know this may seem puzzling right now.  And this may not make sense… but do me one favor… on mother’s day… lets make this a day that we begin to celebrate what it means to be so sure of yourself that you don’t need anyone to give you anything and you don’t need someone to do something nice for you that is expected.  Let this be a reminder that you are to do three things in life…

  1. Question everything
  2. Feel everything
  3. Follow nothing

*Question why you are doing what you are doing in every moment.  Always know what is true and right for you. 

*Feel what is happening in every moment.  Always know what is true and what is right for you.

*Resolve to follow nothing because you are always being what is true and right for you. 

If you can follow these three things for the rest of your life, then I know that as a mom I have received all that I have ever wanted.  Three seeds that I helped plant in this world to grow into the versions of themselves that touches the truest and brightest and deepest versions of themselves and this planet. 

Lastly, embody your own knowing that nothing out there can ever fill you in here.  (Your heart) Especially not me.  Learn to fill yourself up in here so that you can spill out into the world out there in a way that is completely who you already are…you. 

Then I will know that I succeeded at doing my job that this world says that Mother’s do on Mother’s Day…Nothing…Because you realized you are already everything and needed nothing from me to get there.

And you know what… I really don’t want flowers because then that would be taking form the greatest mother of us all, Earth.  And she really needs them right now, more than me.  Maybe that is what they meant by mothers helping mothers on Mother’s Work Day.   

Love you more and less motherly every day,

Mom

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I was just 17…

I was just 17.

I went for a walk this morning with my dog Larkin like I always do, at least 3-4 times a day now, since we have been confined to our homes for over a month. I was feeling very lethargic and like I just did not want to be outside, but I went anyway.  

I had been wondering for several weeks now how can I help in a situation like this? This was on my mind on this morning. I continued, walking down the street checking out all the cracks in the sidewalk like I usually do. I saw the curvature on the one block that I have seen probably 100 times by now from the tree that was dug out a while ago never to return. I saw the same muddy spots, buildings on the side, and rocks in the road. I tend to look down a lot because of Larkin. I am usually talking to her or trying to steer her in the most opportune places for her to go in case she decides to relieve herself. So, I tend to notice the cracks in the sidewalk alot. As I was crossing the street feeling my malaise coursing through my body and noticing how foggy it was outside which only added to my discontent, I came upon a spillage of shiny pennies laying in the middle of the street. I was in awe of the number of pennies and quickly became excited to say the least. Wow, I thought to myself, this must be a gift because all of a sudden, I started to feel a little bit better gazing upon the shiny pennies in the street. You know I felt like it was a sign.  Like it was my ancestors talking to me.  I felt as though my mom was right there.   She has been gone for 30 years now and I feel like it was just yesterday that she left.  Now since we are all in this quarantine period, I have no distractions, I have nothing to take my attention from a deep darkness that still resides within me.  I am no longer attached to anyone or anything that will distract me from the current moment. Meaning, I have no phone calls or text messages coming from my kids or clients, I have no appointments to get to, I have no requirements or requests for errands to run, and I have nothing pressing that needs to get done which would distract me from what’s truly going on within me.

So, there I was, walking Larkin, stopped in the middle of a street and lingering above the shiny copper pennies that laid in the road feeling this subtle excitement like a piece of me was waking up as I came upon my new treasure.  I cannot explain it, but I had the urge to bend down in the middle of the busy road with Larkin attached to me and reach for all the pennies and scoop them up one by one.  So, with each of my 3 fingers on my right hand I picked up each individual penny and placed them in my left hand while carefully making sure I held on to Larkin’s leash. Of course, I was worried that somebody would make a turn on to the street and not see me crouched down or Larkin because of the dense fog, so I did this as quickly as I could in order to make sure we frankly didn’t get hit by a car. As I pick them up, I thought to myself, I wonder how many pennies are in my hand and as I counted them, I notice there were 17.  17 pennies in my hand.  What is this message? I began to think, wondering if there could be a connection. I crossed the road and continued to walk on with 17 pennies in my left-hand and Larkin in my right. I thought, I wonder what does 17 mean to me? I also wondered what am I going to do with 17 shiny copper pennies? Clearly there was no need for me to keep 17 pennies so as I contemplated what the number meant and continued to walk on, I decided that I would scatter these pennies with kindness on my usual route.  As I walked on, I began noticing many things within myself.  I felt unsettled, angry, fearful and tired. Even though these 17 pennies made me feel a little bit better I still felt all of this within my body. It was showing up as sensations of just general tiredness. An unexplained desire to just go back to bed. But I kept on, I kept walking, I kept walking Larkin, and I decided to drop every one of my pennies along my route dispersing them in different areas hoping that the next people that would come along would find joy in finding their new lucky penny.

I began to imagine the little kid on the sidewalk picking up a shiny piece of luck, pressing it in his pocket, and putting a smile on his face. I saw the woman walking along just like me and finding a penny and she too would know it carried a reminder for her to remember.   

Then I remembered what was happening when I was 17. I had just finished my junior year of high school my mom had just died from cancer, my brother had entered a mental institution for a schizophrenic break that he had while attending Ivy League, and my Dad had avoided all contact with me due to his own struggles with alcohol.  I was living with a family who loved me dearly but felt very uneasy and displaced. I was around people but felt all alone. I was a teenager without the skills or the understanding that what I was going through was valid and completely justified. It was an exceedingly difficult time for me. I had a place to live but felt homeless. I had people who loved me but felt abandoned. I had people that encouraged me to go on but felt very discouraged. All the feelings of insecurity, remorse abandonment, unworthiness, and depression came rushing back during this one walk that I had been on by now over 100 times. Right then and right there I was 17 again feeling and sensing the tightness in my throat, the leakage in my eyes, and the stuffiness within my nose. As I kept walking, I kept releasing. I was releasing years of anger and anguish and self-doubt and unworthiness and sadness over a time in my life when the world felt like a very unsafe place to be. I didn’t care if people saw the tears in my eyes or witnessed a passing woman’s anguish in the city streets.  I finally felt justified and the pennies helped.  With each penny that I dropped, I had positive feelings of new life, new sensations, and new smiles and laughter. It was as if I was releasing sadness that had still remained with an understanding resolve for the positive vibes that eventually return with every penny that I dropped. With every tear that I shed it felt difficult and good at the same time.

I share this with you just to share a piece of me and my history.  I share the possibility that maybe there is a piece of all of us that is going through all of this a little differently because we all have different backgrounds, different histories, different perspectives ourselves.  WE never know what filters may be on our lens of reality maybe making our true vision a little harder to truly see with the eyes that we originally had before all of this took place.  I share the possibility that this time that we are all going through together is more than just a time to carry on and get through until things get back to normal. To me, in my perspective, it feels like a time when everything is permanently changing. Normal will not be the same.   It never is when you go through something like this and especially when we collectively go through something like this. It changes us in a way that cannot be explained with words but can only be sensed within our bodies, our hearts. I know that with every unresolved memory that comes up for me during this time I learn to resolve and release them because I have done this all many times before. I’ve lived through a lot of crisis more than I can put in words in this essay. What I do want to offer is encouragement, understanding, peace, love, compassion and kindness for everyone going through hardship for everyone missing out on something for everyone having a tough time.  I get it.  I may not fully understand what you’re going through, I never will.   I do understand that this can be a particularly hard time for many in so many different ways I just want you to know I hear you I understand and I’m here for you with what I can offer… a friendship, a possible understanding, and the possibility that maybe I can help. So here’s what I’d like to offer…

I would like to offer a donation based Intuitive Clearing Session to anyone who would like to energetically work on any issue having to do with emotional pain, sadness, stress, anxiety, fear or trauma.  I have training ranging from reiki mastership to craniosacral therapy to ancestral clearing with John Newton to zen shiatsu.   I am an Occupational Therapist who has worked through much of my own trauma in many life experiences and with my own lineage and family.  I have numerous years of experience.  I enjoy working from teens to adults.  Just respond to this email and we can schedule our session.  All sessions are done over the phone or through a web format most comfortable for you. 

I would also like to offer the 28 Days of Conscious Intuitive Living again. I will be beginning this on Monday May 4th.  This is a 4-week program of intensive healing work that delivers audio recordings and email writeups to your inbox every morning.  This is a huge undertaking for me and one I am willing to share. I will be redoing this once again.  In order to honor those that have been a part of this program in the past the price will remain the same but two things will differ:

-1- If you choose to be a part of the program you receive an opportunity to be a part of it as many times as you like for the same amount. Also, if you have done this program before you are free to begin again for no charge.

-2- If it is too much to pay the full amount, contact me.  We will work out a way for you to get on the program that is good and right for your resources at this time.   

Lastly, I would like to offer a new class for everyone to be a part of… Meridians, Movement, Breath, and Forgiveness This will be an on-line class…with the interest I will offer classes to help release and resolve ancestor and lineage long held beliefs within the body in order to help with your own healing for today.  This will be donation based. 

I need to hear from you and your interest in any of the above.  I can only go on with any of these programs if the people come. 

My heart wants as many people as possible to receive. I honestly believe that everyone has their gifts their abilities in their own way to help our current situation. I would like to be a part of helping.   

Please contact me if you have any interest at all.  Let us connect… even if it is to chat. Thanks for listening thanks for actually reading this entire passage. It means a lot to me. 

Who knows, maybe you are feeling ‘17’ too. 

Love,

Jennifer

Book Release, Master Energy Healing Sessions, Kundalini, & Harness Your Intuition

Book Release, Master Energy Healing Sessions, Kundalini, & Harness Your Intuition
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It’s tough sometimes… AND there is help… we can transcend anything… we only need the tools and support to get through and to the other side of whatever may be standing in your way…

You can do this! Navigate through the mystery, recharge and resolve the energy, ascend into the highest potential… come and renew and expand… opportunity is always around the corner… NO MATTER WHAT

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Returning to ourselves…

After being away from ‘home’ for 5 weeks and returning… what I have learned thus far…

There is something special about getting away from the usual for an extended time! Awareness comes alive when you leave your nest and dive into a new life, even if it temporary.

Usually, it takes about two weeks of being in a new place to begin to adjust to the vibration of that new place. At least that is what it is like for me.

Then when I do and I end up staying longer, like I did, I begin to join in with that new vibration. Overall, if you ever do something like what I am explaining, hopefully it is a higher vibration and you are elevating your life upwards! My experience was exactly this.

When we (my daughter and I) were in St. Augustine we adjusted to life by the sea. Clearing and cleansing our energy fields every day. Keeping us in alignment with our highest energetic vibration, connected to our Source, and open to receive our intuitive guidance throughout our days.

Several of the ways we were able to remain connected 24/7 revolved around self care tools. We followed the patterns of the full moon, always finding her and making sure we connected with her on a daily basis. Whether she was out at night or during the day, we found a way to connect with the masterful vibration of this feminine energy even if it was only for a simple 5 minute pleasurable gaze.

We rose before sunrise and actually used the hour before the sun peeked over the water to allow the vibratory creation of the infinite to sink deeply into our cells and help us imagine what we were going to create that day. Every day, most days it was just me (teenagers enjoy their sleep!), I sat for ‘Guidance’ (something Debra Poneman speaks beautifully about… her Yes to Success Program is #1 at promoting this) and allowed spirit to speak through me at the peak of the energy of the day. The hour BEFORE the sun rises is one of the most transformative and vibrationally high times of day.

We kept our energy fields cleansed and cleared daily. We took time out of our busy schedule to make sure we cleaned up and cleared our fields through various daily practices. Knowing where we begin and where our energy ends and what is ours versus someone or something else’s is very important when we are following our highest potential and purpose.

We took time to exercise, meditate, fill our bodies with high vibration foods, study and work hard, and play hard throughout the week. It was a balance of work, rest, study, releasing, and resolve to become our new selves. And we did it.

We ended our days in meditation always allowing for communion with Source consciousness, even if it was for 5-10 minutes.

Why do I share this? Because, it’s not that I changed anything about my normal practice. This is what I typically do anyway. It’s that the environment we were in completely helped us shift into an entirely new vibratory awareness that is way more elevated than where I was before. How do I know? Because I FELT the difference when I came back home.

I live in a lovely space. I love my home. And now that I have been away, I realized I was not only ready for a shift on one level but on ALL levels. Physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually and in all areas of my life; community, relationships, family, career, purpose, health, and more.

In order to continue this shift I had to not only adjust to coming back home but also to continue to bring in this high vibration from where I was to where I currently am. And it continues to work. High vibration awareness means we live in our joy. We bring in the infinite possibility to the finite existence. We become the miraculous life we are seeking right where we are. And that is what I realized out in St. Augustine.

I go wherever I am. Therefore, I must be the change that I seek out there and no one else can do this except me. So here I am, in deep realization and gratitude for all of this and here to help bring in awareness in practices that I hope I can extend to others.

So over the next several months…this will be my focus. Sharing with you what I did, and what I always do on a daily basis to help remain ‘high’ in life. High vibration ALWAYS draws unlimited prosperity, health, and joy to you. Always in all ways. Learning how to release and resolve and remain untethered to any controlled outcome is the key.

So this week, I would love to share with you something I do almost daily. Practice meditation, mantras, and vibratory awareness.

Our energy field extend to 9 feet around us. When we have space to extend our fields and practice clearing our fields every day it is unsurmountable what positive outcomes can happen on an elevated and enhanced energetic level.

We have an infinite number of chakras within and around the body as well as energetic layers extending out to the infinite. When we remain vibratory aligned in an elevated energetic state we not only effect the positive propelling us forward into our souls highest potential but all those around us as well. We first give ourselves permission to become more and then it naturally extends outwards. When we take care of ourselves this is what happens. They key is to know how to tune in to high vibration, to practice, and remain in ‘vacation’ mode. It can be done.

We all go on vacations and many of us go away to ‘get away’ from it all. I wonder, what are we trying to ‘get away’ from? Maybe, if we pay attention to our vibration and our spirit’s joy…maybe we become the vacation we are seeking. I believe so.

It may require work, and we may have to finally face what we have been avoiding… but it is worth diving in, especially with support.

That’s what we do, when we consciously practice from a point of conscious awareness through mantra and meditation. Daily, I need to return to me. And when, I don’t, I slip into something I’m not. This doesn’t serve anyone any good. We all have gifts, and when we use our gifts to our highest potential through awareness and consciousness in high vibrational states we become everything we were seeking out there. And then, we can do nothing but spread light. It’s so simple and yet so simply profound. And, darn it, that is exactly what most of us need.

Cleansing our energy fields through mantra and meditation is one of the ways to connect back to who you are. Not through anything else but sole purpose to become more of what you already are; gifted. When we find our gifts it is a profound experience.

Tuning in and clearing our energy field is a way to do this. For the next several weeks we will be doing this at BLACK CAT in Libertyville. Tune in and join me for Kundalini Yoga. This is a deeply spiritual practice full of simple movements, breath work, meditation and mantras meant to clear the field, realign the chakras of the body, and strengthen your connection with your spirit…the source of who you are.

Do you want to hear your own guidance? Are you seeking to know yourself more? Do you want to open to your intuition? It’s all available through this practice.

Kundalini Yoga at Black Cat in Libertyville this week we are focusing on the Ten bodies of Prosperity…. clearing the ten light bodies and opening to prosperity. We have an energy field, and when it is highly attuned to our highest potential and purpose we become the vehicle for infinite creation through finite existence. This practice will be geared to help create this possibility. Join me

Join me on Instagram and IntuitLove Facebook and YouTube where I will be sending out weekly tips and announcements of continued opportunities to expand your awareness and realign yourself to your highest potential. Whether its through a practice of mine or someone else I will be sharing insights and connections to help you become more of you!

Come for a Reiki + Intuitive Healing Session at Black Cat Yoga on Thursdays! Sign up for a 75 minute session meant to realign your vibration and help your resolve and release any restrictions keeping you from your highest potential in all areas of life. More Here!

Finally, announcing my new book on Amazon and ABE books in the US and UK!

Transcending Limitations – How to Start Where You Are and Create Your New World

This book dives into the what inspired me to get going on my spiritual healing path, why I do this work, and how it can miraculously change your life. My son, propelled me on this path when he was born with a ‘dis’ability. This is how I overcame and continue to overcome all limitations.

Order today! It is selling out and sometimes it takes them time to restock shelves.

Lastly, just connect. Connect with each other. Connect with your family, friends, and people that mean something in your life. We are all here to make a difference. Thank you for making a difference in my life. Every single person I ever get to spend time with is that difference and every single person creates miracles for each other. Thank you for being my miracle.

5 weeks as full time students, and a life time of memories…

For the past 5 weeks I have been a student of Kripalu yoga with my daughter.  Here is what I learned…

The last 5 weeks have brought me experiences of joy and wonder.  I have learned to be guided by spirit like never before, to stop worrying about the future and to spend the rest of my life in the present. 

It sounds simple enough, doesn’t it?  I finally realized nothing really matters except for the experiences of life itself.  Nothing really matters except for what you would like to experience in each moment of life. 

Really…if we are tuned in and turned onto spirit and living the truth of who we are then what is happening out there in the world may not seem like such a monstrous thing we must overcome.  We are reflections of what we believe ourselves to be.   In this world, we can see every facet of the diamond and look through every lens that is possible through each other.  We can see the good in almost everything.  It’s up to us to decide how we’d like to view every situation.  I can decide in a moment what any experience means to me, and I can decide to live any way I desire.  I can be full of prosperity and the riches of knowledge, and I can be limitless in all my experiences. No matter what. 

Easy to say and sometimes difficult to do.  We can become filled with so much doubt that we can limit ourselves with the belief that we can’t do something even before we try.  This happens on so many levels.  All I can say, is that in the past 5 weeks I have had the experience of a lifetime. 

Maybe it was because I was simply ready to receive and allow spirit to work through me on all levels. Maybe it was because I was ready to make my own decisions in life about what really mattered to me.  Maybe I have finally realized that we all have this choice, and we never need to live by anyone else’s standards. Maybe I have finally accepted the truth of who I am. 

That’s a beautiful thing.   

In acceptance of the self is freedom. 

There is no malice or perceived judgement behind it.  It’s merely a simple knowing that you are perfect exactly as you are and there is nothing else to understand except the perfection that is already within you. 

We can spend a lifetime searching for answers.  Our world points us ‘to the answer’ everywhere we turn.   Eat this, take that, do this, become that, and you will finally be ‘ok’.  That’s what they tell us on a conscious and subconscious level.  And maybe, we just need to pause to see what was already there.  Maybe, we never needed to do anything, be anything, or have anything.  Maybe we just needed to become the love that was always waiting for us to see, feel, and know… already within our own hearts.  Maybe… just maybe this is it.   

The past 5 weeks I have spent an enormous amount of time with a new tribe of Kripalu yoga healers… here is what I learned from each of them… by them simply being who they are to me… a facet of my diamond.

I learned the power of determination and how to move confusing and clouded energy into channeled focused energy by watching others move into their own self-mastery.

I learned of the strength and wisdom that comes from someone being a balanced being of masculine and feminine energy able to move through any societal expectations and transform themselves into a healthier version of who they truly are.

I learned of the unbounding integrity and safety that can come from someone who feels free to share their love and joy for life by simply being themselves and wanting others to feel the love and joy that is already within them. 

I learned of the joy that can be spread amongst people by simply laughing and allowing themselves to sing and fill their lives with amusement.

I learned of how strong so many people are on so many different levels and how through support and belief in others we can rise above our own thought filled limitations ourselves.

I learned of the wisdom and magic that can come from someone so young and so profoundly full of knowledge that is lightyears ahead of us all. 

I learned the importance of language and attention to detail and how still, the only thing that matters is the heart connection from another individual by simply being themselves. 

I learned of the flow and creativity that can be inspired by one person to inspire a whole group to be in the flow and creativity of life by simply being who they are. 

I learned so much more… and overall… I learned to just be me.  To be graceful and messy all at once and to allow this to happen.  To process what is within me without having to figure it out.  To allow the mess and the wonder to just happen all on my own. To just enjoy life by being in-joy.

Ultimately, I learned to lay my final sword down… the sword of self-judgment… the most deadly sword of all. 

And if I did nothing else in this life… I would finally know… I am ok… just the way I am. 

Thank you, God.

You are as God, being born again…

I think of you as a God.

You are God.

You are Creator.

As such, as you learn to bring more light into your body and become the vessel of light you are meant to be, you are able to clear and ascend higher into your consciousness.

As such, nothing is left behind and you realize that this is only about becoming more of yourself. 

More wholeness.

More Oneness. 

Which means, you can share this with others.  The overwhelming abundance that comes into you, through your connection with Source consciousness creates a cascading waterfall of endless resources capable of reaching as far as your heart’s desire.  It is capable of becoming one with everything. 

When you are Source, you are One.  In that Oneness you become the light.

In the light, which is endless, everything shifts. 

Darkness does not remain.

It can not, it’s just not possible.  It never is. Never was possible. 

Light…just is.  As you shine it opens doors for the answers to keep shining in return.  It keeps merging with you, and you keep becoming One with it all.

Yes, there is choice.  You have a choice.  A choice to stay where you are and continue shining right where you are.  Or a choice to allow yourself to grow, to expand, and to allow the light to shine into the smallest places of your heart.  The smallest spaces creeping into the unseen realms that have remained hidden and darkened with fear.  The smallest spaces that seem incomprehensible, unreachable, and unable to be unearthed.  These are the spaces the light will go.  These are the spaces that we have not even encountered yet.  These are the things we are afraid of.  These are our fears that keep us up at night, feeling alone in the dark, and even miserable.

To allow the light in… allows for the light to reach these spaces.  It allows for consciousness to come pouring in as a waterfall.  The light comes pouring in, shedding the darkness, shedding the fears.  Allowing for expansion to spaces and places of our life we thought not possible or that maybe we did not even think of at all. 

There is always hope.  Hope allows the light in.  It is the first step.  The first crack in the dawn of the new day.  It is the cloud that covers the light that eventually drifts to the side exposing what is truly underneath.

Hope allows the light in.  It is the beginning.  The beginning to the end.  The end of the fear.  The end of the darkness.  The end of despair.  The beginning of a new again.  The rebirth.

Hope is the crack that creates.  A crack so small that it can not even be seen with the naked eye and yet only felt with the heart.  A longing. An echo. An echo of the eternal abys calling for recognition and calling to return to its abandonment that was hidden from long, long ago.

When we see it, the tiniest light, the light through the cracks of our heart, we can not deny the emergence.  The unraveling begins.

The twist and turns that break us free, break us open, turn our lives upside down.  Leave us breathless, placeless, and beyond. 

It breaks us open…cracking through the layers of our shell…calling to us…asking us to become something more.  Something so desirable to the senses.  Something fragrant. Something only seen in the early morning mist or the setting of the shady dusk upon our hearts.  Sometimes, we can barley make it out and yet we know it remains.  The longing for something else, something new, something fresh.  Something.

Something that just wants to grow, wants to shake, shimmer, and stir.  Eventually, as we attend to the cracks, as we allow the light to pour threw it breaks us into more of ourselves.  It is revealed. It shines so bright that it can be contained no more… and the emergence happens totally on its own.  It becomes more, we become more, and the contagiousness expands. 

We become reverent, peaceful, and whole. 

We know not the answers and only the calling of our hearts that is uniquely our own.  We become bright again.  Talking ceases, words have no description, silence takes over, and reverence remains. 

Light remains.

This is death.  This is oneness.  This is merging. 

It is here, right here that we die again.  We become one again.  And we merge again. 

Time after time.  It happens. 

The light finally becomes you and all the rest no longer matters.  It is here that you become.  You no longer are you but merely a breath. 

You are a pause between the words.  You are the experience.

We spend our whole lives searching for this.  We search for the death, the merging, the reemerging, the experience.  And then, we do it all over again and again and again.  We are as the breath… always there, cycling through, trying to let go, trying to hold on, trying to expand, trying to contract, trying to come to balance. We are cyclical like that. 

We search to find ourselves in all that we see, think, and do out there. 

We search for ourselves in our parents, our siblings, our families, our partners, our friends.  We search to find ourselves in our jobs, our careers, our societies, our communities, our institutions. 

We search for ourselves in our food, our drinks, our plants, our herbs, our medicines.

We search for ourselves in our movements, our activities, our social obligations.

In our search to become more and to be more we never find who we truly are…

What is happening?

What are we searching for? 

The light of who we are, the great I AM. 

And when we find it, when we taste it, and when we realize its there, we spend our lives trying to obtain it… never realizing it never left… it was always there.  No where to go… no where to be… nothing to do.  It was here all along.  In our hearts. 

And yet, the quest takes over.  It becomes us, it embodies us.  We become the endless search for something more.  The quest for knowledge.  The quest for fortune.  The quest for elixirs.  The quest for more.  The quest temps us, becomes us, takes us over.  It is endless… until one day… it comes… the realization…

As we enter into the altar of our lives, we realize it was always here within us.  It never left.  It was always waiting for us to return again.  And then we know…we have arrived. 

It is a savory experience that can not be held for very long. 

There is no grasping.

There is no control.

It definitely can not be bought or sold. 

We can only learn to merge with it, to allow it to carry us to new experiences… and then we must let go again. 

A constant dance of leading and being lead.  Feeling into the situation with no expectation and then letting go again. 

And yet… we still have a choice. 

There is always a choice… it’s always there. 

We can choose to hold on…eventually learning this never works.  It becomes an addiction…wanting more and then regretting we even tried to do it again. 

We continue to seek outside ourselves always returning to the eternal wave within our own hearts. 

We slow, we deepen, we become more.

We learn, time and time again… we never left our light… it was there all along. 

We look within the mirror of our lives, and we return to the truth of who and what we are. 

The light.

The great I AM.

The Atman.

The Brahman. 

The sacred texts.

The scriptures. 

The sounds.

The silence. 

We are.

Take hold of the light

…we can’t.

Grasp the water in our hands

…we can’t.

Hold our breath eternally

…we can’t. 

See the light…we can.

Feel the water…we can.

Embrace the breath… and it is there.

We can’t take it, we can only experience it… in so many ways. 

We experience it through the people, the places, the things around us.  We share it with others, we live it.  Through this… we allow for more, we experience more, we share more, we become more, and we return to the state of consciousness that knows we are more. 

See the beauty in the waterfall, the sun, the moon, the stars… and know this is you. 

And don’t hold on… this is the balance.  As we hold on… we surely will slip, we fall, we crash, and we burn once more. 

Instead, we let go in true appreciation for the remembrance of the truth of who we are.

Then we can return to the presence of our hearts.  A true undying reverence for everything we are and are not.  Because we know, every day we are born again.

(Thank you for reading… even though I am away… remote sessions are always available. Just reach out. ~Jennifer)

Mother/Daughter Teacher Training – The Journey Begins

Day 1 – Journey of learning to become a Yin Yoga Teacher

Nora and I had such a wonderful trip down to St. Augustine the past couple of days.  We rode down with a car full of essentials for our 5 week journey into the world of yoga.  It took us two days to get here.  When we arrived… we checked in to our second floor flat, unpacked the stuffed car, changed into our swimming gear, and headed for the beach.  Mind you, by the time we approached the water it was 8pm. 

To our surprise, the water was warm.  Mother nature is strong… her winds can push you out to the sea, and the waves can sweep you around the ocean floor.  We were cleansed and cleared of any energetic debris as we swam against and with the relentless ocean.  There is something about the ocean and what it can do with your body if you allow her to have her way.  Quickly, we were forced to work with her and definitely not against her.  There is no stopping mother nature.  She does not pause just so you can catch your breath.  The waves on St. Augustine Beach are continuous and strong.  One after the other they come crashing down and forcing you to face her wisdom.  Either learn to swim with her or don’t bother staying in the water for very long.  As Nora and I quickly adjusted to what she was telling us, we were able to swim a bit longer and allow ourselves to be blessed with her offering of cleanliness and surrender. 

As we were renewed from the long drive we quickly grew accustomed to our place that we would be calling home for the next 5 weeks.  The shores of St. Augustine beach where surfers come to ride the waves most days out of the year.  We are here for a new experience… a mother/daughter yoga training aimed to intensively shift our life as we are emersed in the teachings daily from 7am to 5:30 pm.  It feels like we are conceiving, growing, and birthing a child not in 9 months but packed into 5 weeks.  This must be what its like to be birthed as a horse.  Out the birth canal and into the earthly realm ready to walk and run within hours. 

Wildly amazing, free, and unknown to many of us is our ability to soak up information and bring it back out into the teachings effortlessly.  We will be soaking up knowledge that has been around for thousands of years and a lineage of gurus who have led the world into a new way of being that continues to grow and shape our new world we are coming into. 

This journey is going to be life changing on many levels… most of all, I am looking forward to growing in strength and stamina physically, mentally, and emotionally.  These past two years have been nothing less than the challenge of the sea waves that will take you down if you don’t learn how to swim with the currant.  As a society we have learned to dive in and do things we thought never possible… as individuals we have been shaken, stirred, and forced to move ourselves into the uncomfortable. 

So here we are, beginning a journey that will go by quickly and work with us and against us depending on how we respond to what is being handed to us. 

For the next 5 weeks I am working remotely, still offering energy healing sessions by zoom or phone. They are just as powerful.  Some may say, even more powerful with the energy of the elements at our sides as the ocean waters are combined into the movement that is created in the sessions to cleanse our bodies and fields energetically. 

Energy doesn’t die…it is transformed.  We are transforming, sessions are being offered to transform, and the world is transforming.  As I continue to take this journey the next 5 weeks it would be my utmost pleasure to assist in an energy healing session at any time along YOUR journey.  Just because I am away does not mean I am AWAY from what I LOVE MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE I DO… be a vessel for change and bringing light and healing through to serve. 

Let me know if you would like a session.  Send me a text, reach out through an email, or take the time to call.  I look forward to sharing all of this with you.

I am also scheduling home and business energy healing sessions as well as manifestation circles and reiki classes when I get back in August.  Please reach out for these as well. 

All love,

Jennifer

I Believe…

I believe there is another way.

I believe that our journeys do not need to be difficult or hard.

I believe that we do not need to suffer to gain knowledge and insight.

I believe we do not need to fight to make a change.

I believe that we do not need to make others see to get our way.

I believe that duality is an illusion.

I believe there is another way.

I believe we are here to dismantle the illusions that have covered up our hearts.

I believe that inner work is the way to shifting our outer world.

I believe that if everyone believed in themselves and loved themselves unconditionally, they would understand the presence of love within themselves, and this would orchestrate the world to shift to a new level of consciousness simply on its own.

I believe that dismantling the thoughts and beliefs within the “i” self is the only path that helps us understand the meaning of ‘know thyself’ and the path of the “I Am”.

I believe that love in the all-knowing and encompassing peaceful sense of the word is the power that is ultimately connected and will handle it all.

I believe that miracles come from within and then inspire and enlighten a new path of light within the consciousness of groups and societies.

I believe that love is a majorly misunderstood vibration that we have never allowed ourselves to sense, know, and fully embody its true unlimited power.

I believe in unlimited thought, imagination, creativity, joy, and ideas that elevate and enhance our well-being in masterful ways incomprehensible to the mind.

I believe if we continue our own individual paths of self-healing, we will collectively influence the healing of our world.

I believe that you as the individual are that powerful.

And yes, I believe in LOVE. Not in the sense that creates a soft and rather nurturing place to fall or stay. Yes, that is part of it… But I truly believe that love knows NO BOUNDARIES and when we feel limits within us, it is truly a calling to elevate, enlighten, and lift ourselves from the illusions. This may take work at overcoming the fears associated with the illusion and yet again, the belief that it is going to be difficult is an illusion itself.

I believe in love.

I believe in love so powerful it has the power to walk through villages and towns to create health and relieve sickness and pain just by its mere presence.

I believe in love and its ability to hold strong in the face of adversity by its own peaceful power that is reverent, fully connected, and ONE with something greater than we could ever imagine ourselves.

I believe in love that is the oceans, a love that is the mountains, the trees, the land, the beings, and the spirits that walk this earth. It is the love that is within each of us.

I believe when we surrender to this knowing, we surrender to something capable of everything and thereby dismantling the illusions all at once.

I believe in love.

I believe when we come together to be the light, we spread wisdom only felt intuitively within the heart. This inspires us to be different, inspires us to rethink different, inspires us to want differences, and in this beautiful tapestry of difference we are creating, we will remember that it all began from going within. Just like it did when we first came here as a baby. WE SOAKED IT ALL UP IN ANTICIPATION OF AN INCREDIBLE MAGICAL WORLD.

I BELIEVE IT’S STILL THERE AND IT IS YOU AND IT CAN BE NOTHING BUT WHAT WE ARE ALREADY.

I BELIEVE WE ONLY NEED TO TURN THE LIGHTS ON WITHIN OURSELVES, OUR OWN THOUGHTS AND BELIEFS AND DISMANTLE WHAT IS NO LONGER HELPFUL OR SERVING US SO THAT WE CAN FREE OURSELVES TO SEE THAT WE ARE ALREADY LIVING IN THE NEW WORLD.

I BELIEVE WE HAVE ALREADY ARRIVED.

ALL MY LOVE,

Jennifer

This excerpt came from my new book coming out soon… “Transcending Limitations – How to Start Where You Are & Create Your New World”

Over 20 years ago I was thrust into a world I never anticipated… a world full of heartache and strain. It was through the birth of my first child, born with a complicated and life threatening disability, that my entire word was fiercely forced into a radical change. Through this journey, I wrote about all the changes and shifts that needed to happen to create a new world full of miracles and healings. It is because of these insights that I do what is called to me to do today. Help the world elevate and shift into their own expansion. I will never stop doing this work and the shifts will continue to happen. I invite you to do the same.

Join me for the next several months as I continue to share writings from the book and talk about how we can all transcend our worlds of limitations that we have all created ourselves. I believe in miracles, truth, and radical healing. I’ve seen it time and time again.

Every week I will be sharing something from my book. It is an easy way for me to connect as I take a new journey out to St. Augustine for the next 5 weeks and learn a new skill as I go deeper into my practices. When I return, I will have some new classes being offered at various locations with continued workshops and sessions always available. Please reach out as soon as possible if you need a session in person before June 23rd. After that, I will be only remote…and these sessions are just as powerful.

All my love and more from the universe. -Jennifer

June…Burning away the old…to encourage new growth

Welcome to June! Traditionally, we enter summer this month.  A time of celebration of accomplishments, playtime, and relaxation.  That was traditionally what used to happen.  If you are feeling unrestful this time of year… you are not alone.   We really do not have cause to feel unrestful right now.  There has been so much unraveling these past couple of years that many of us are still trying to figure out where our roots are planted, and which ground is safe to live on.  Well, I have to say…it’s not going to get easier.  We need to get used to feeling the unrest this month.  The unearthing that is happening is further asking us to become untethered to anything that may be keeping us from living our soul’s purpose and spirit’s joy.  In so many ways.  It a further burning away of the old to make room for the new growth on the horizon. 

Farmer’s often deliberately burn their crops to remove plants that are already growing and to help the plants that are about to come up. 

This is what is happening to us.  There is old energy around that is still trying to take hold of us in old ways.  This does not work anymore.  If you are like me, I’m easily deceived by old ways.  It’s easy for me to dip back into ways that feel usual and deliberately comfortable.  It’s one of the reasons why I spend so much time practicing the work that I do.  I know that change requires work and that habits are patterns of belief systems that keep us in a cycle of ‘loop de loop’ that can be satisfying to some but unquestionably frustrating to others.  It’s like you are caught in the movie ‘Ground Hog Day’ and you can’t find your way out! 

Farmer’s burn their crops to permanently leave the old growth behind.  They intuitively know that it is time to replenish because the old root structure does not work anymore.  That is what is happening right now.  The old patriarchal ways do not have a hold anymore and they are quickly falling apart.  We just haven’t realized how extensive and far reaching these ‘old’ energies have had a hold on society.  And now, we will get to see more.  More will be revealed and more of an upleveling will happen.  This is good.  There are cracks that are happening…and when this happens the light just has to pour through.  We never know what is going to come out of the cocoon structure and it can be scary to think that it may not be a butterfly.  Be patient, trust, and have faith in the light. 

Crop burning is an age-old practice brining new life and energy to their fields.  In order for farmers to do this, all the conditions must be ‘just right’.  Not too wet or dry, windy or stagnant, hot or cold.  Another words they have to be prepared to ‘just do it’ on the right day once it appears.  On that day, they are ready to go.  They have prepared.  They know which crops to burn for the greatest replenishment. 

This is energy.  Much like you.    Playing it safe and cozy only works for a little while…. Now we must emerge.   Through these times we are being asked to go further into where we have yet to terrain.  We are stretching and molding ourselves into our endless vastness of light energy.  We are being expected to become more versions of ourselves until we completely become the highest version of ourselves that is calling us to grow from the crop burnings. 

And timing is everything for us too.  The point is to become positive, resilient, and connected.   Allow, yourself to be unearthed and shift into the unpredictable.  Keep moving forward into your soul’s purpose and spirit’s joy and allow the ground to be lifted, burned, or unearthed.  Remember, we are being asked to move further into our light and help each other see the truth of who we are and how we are all connected multidimensionally in amazing ways.  Love will look and feel differently, our tribes will continue to shift, and the powers at be will also be shifting.  What that means… continue to know thyself.   Say ‘Yes!’ to the universe and keep moving forward towards your goals and desires.  And instead of emerging as the expected butterfly…the dragonfly will once again return! 

For June… I will continue to support growth through the following…

1:1 Transcending Limitation Sessions – up to 90 minutes of collaborating with your guides and energetically unearthing energetic blocks, shifting habits and patterns, and miraculously shifting into a new version of you. 

Reiki 1 – Sign up today… 3 openings for June 17 and 18 …

Reiki 3 – 2 openings for June 5th (this weekend)

Kundalini Yoga on Tuesday evenings … JOIN ME on ZOOM or in person!
I am out of town the month of July… so please contact me today…

AND New happenings…

Space Energy Clearings… much like crop burning… we must level the energy to allow for new growth to occur.  The old energy does not have a hold anymore and needs an extra push to be transcended and transformed into light.  This is what I do!  I come into your home or business and energetically clear the old stagnant energy through a process called angelic light weaving, angelic sound vibrations, smudging, mantra energy protection, and grid work.  Old souls often need to be released into the light as well. 

These are $120 an hour…. It requires a lot of work and I spend a great deal of time and effort working with the energy of the structure and you to collaborate and get a communal agreement on your new path together.  We can have agreements with structures to work together and help us all succeed in our life’s purpose.  Call me for more information 224-500-7797

“Thank You, God!”

Recently… I have done a lot of forgiveness… offering up… forgoing… what this means for me is that I have had A LOT of scenarios happening in my life lately that have placed me in a position of just ultimate gratitude for what is already present in my life.

Repeatedly, I have been shown how abundant our universe is and when we become aware of the amazing surplus we already have, even more comes along.  Really… it does. 

My family and lineage lived in lack and fear for a very long time.  There was a lot of fighting, working hard, and insecurity about how we were going to survive growing up.  It was not a good environment.  Needless to say, I unconsciously took this in as a child and ended up portraying this vibration in my day to day relationships.  I had no idea how much of my life was based on lack until I began to pay attention to the dialogue that would often run rampant in my head. 

I never really believed I was enough.  Always striving to do more, be more, have more, and try to prove to myself I was enough.  There were so many reasons why… too many to list.  When I decided to really look at what I kept saying to myself that just seemed so negative inside I began to realize that I just needed to once and for all, put an end to the internal mayhem happening within me and just enjoy the ride.  Once I released the internal upset I was causing within myself on a daily basis and just lay everything to rest… I instead, brought in a new phrase with every perceiving difficult task that happened.  I adopted the new phrase… “Thank you, God!”  Yep… anything that happened that was frustrating or just made me feel like things were not working out… AGAIN became followed up with a “Thank you, God!” 

  • The refrigerator stopped working, “Thank you, God!” then the mechanic would show up that day.
  • My dog was having severe skin allergies… “Thank you, God!” and suddenly, the answer to the allergy dilemma appeared. 
  • I had to be in two places at once and had no idea how to solve the issue… “Thank you, God!”  and one of the appointments would get cancelled on their own. 
  • I had a lack of funds to pay for a recent credit card bill, “Thank you, God” and a check appeared in the mail. 

The list goes on…

What I’m trying to say… we need to begin to turn our thoughts around to anticipate everything that happens in our life as a blessing…

Everything. 

Gas prices are up to $5.15 a gallon…. “Thank you, God!”  someone offers a carpool.

Food doubles in price… “Thank you, God!”  Food gift certificates are delivered to our door. A friend buys me dinner, someone invites me over for lunch, and the local market is having a sale on plants to grow your own food. 

There are ALWAYS answers to a perceived problem… we just must be in anticipation of the amazing outcome that is coming…. No matter what!  Thank you, GOD!  For always bringing the answers… because I know you have everything I need and everything I want already taken care of even if I don’t know it yet…

Reiki has been a gift for me in this manner…

I have been doing Reiki for over 20 years… it teaches…

“Just for today, do not anger, do not worry, and be filled with gratitude.  Devote yourself to your work and be kind to everyone and everything.” 

So with that… Reiki is another way to live life from a place of eternal knowing that all is taken care of… “Thank you, God!” 

I think back on how it has changed my life over the years…. I mean because my son was born with a disability, I was put on a quest to learn every healing modality out there to help him and now I help others!  “THANK YOU, GOD!”

There is so much to be thankful for and so many reasons why…. When we turn it around… everything around… we can have an amazing life right where we are… “Thank you God for everything!”  Life is amazing… no matter what. 

Thank yourself for beginning to bring your awareness to how we tend to focus on what we don’t have as a society… then bring your awareness to how you can do it differently… add in a “Thank you, God” and watch how everything shifts…. “Thank you, God!” becomes a magical mystery of all allowing the anticipated answers to every perceived problem to flow to you… & yes it does flow. 

My mom died when I was 16…. “Thank you, God,” I was able to become psychic because of it! 

My Dad was an alcoholic growing up… “Thank you, God” I realized how addictions can rob people’s lives and it brought compassion in. 

My brother had schizophrenia and was threatening my life, “Thank you, God!” it taught me boundaries… even with family… some of the hardest things for people to understand. 

My son was born with a disability, “Thank you, God!”  I realized I was a lightworker. 

Another son had medical issues… “Thank you, God!” I realized how much our environmental exposures have an effect on our body and how to transform these through diet, herbs, vitamins, clean water, and stones, minerals, etc.… “Thank you, God!”

My husband had a medical issue…oh the number of lessons from this was amazingly transformative for us as a couple… “Thank you, God!” 

A house fire… so much to learn… left us with no home… “Thank you, God!” our home was beautifully rebuilt into an oasis of love.   

Our dog died…. “Thank you, God” … opened me up to love even more.

Oh, so much…. With each loss, disappointment, and shift it has made me shift my perception even quicker and more profoundly than ever before.  “Thank you, God!”

No attachments… just to be in the moment and devote my life to my work…

Thank you God for bringing me Reiki…. So I can pass along these amazing teachings….

Thank you, God, for bringing me Kundalini Yoga so I could feel and be the transformation I have wanted to bring more into my life and help others…

With that… Thank you God for allowing me to share and allowing me to pass along what is meaningful and transformative to me… Thank you, God for you! 

Here are some new offerings coming up just around the corner!!!

New Dates added for Reiki 1!!!

Kundalini YOGA!!!!

Come join me… on line and in person…as I venture out to teaching!  Yeay!  I love Kundalini… and the amount of energy and transformation that happens is a definite “THANK YOU GOD!” in these classes!!!

The Heart – True Love 

Lesson 4 – The Heart – Love (From “Transcending Limitation-How to Start Where You Are & Transcend Limitation”)

What is the heart?  The center of creation.  This is where it is at…all of it…all of what?  You may ask. Everything and nothing all at the same time.  Every ‘good’ thought, every ‘bad’ thought – everything and nothing.  Meaning, its all there.  And it is all not there too.  Meaning, everything we have stored there that has been made by the external truth is there waiting to be uncovered and released into the nothingness that it is that it came from.  Meaning, every challenge, every idea, every philosophy, every happy thought, and every difficulty all came from there.  If we/you/or I could just tune back into the heart then we could see – everything is an illusion, even the happy ones.  And when we can tune into everything as an illusion it means we can drop in even further to all acceptance.  And when we drop in even deeper to all acceptance we can sense and feel and know it is all taken care of in new and more beautiful ways all on its own and all because we never left.  We were right here and surrounded by it all – all the time – all space and time and dimension – it was always here – all Love. 

Remember…
Love is Patient
Love is Kind…
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not paid.  It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrong.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails.  (Adapted from 1 Corinthians 13:1)

If this is truth, which it is – then – love can do anything, and nothing is impossible to love.  If we are love…then nothing is impossible to us.  What stands in the way of us knowing this is ourselves.  Meaning…we can do anything…anything.  Everything is possible because we are love.  Meaning – anytime there is something that happens, something you feel or sense, something you hear or see that brings up anything less than love like anger, hatred, rage, fear, etc. you breath into it…allow it to spiral out of you…whatever it is.  Because it is not you…love is all you are. 

All illusions will release, all insecurities will filter out, and all impossibilities will cease to exist.  Because we can choose our creations through our awareness.  This is why meditation, centering, and heartful practices centering us in the body are critical to a loving and joyful life because they create the space we need in order to tune in, drop in, and deeply sense feel and know in the midst of chaos at all times.  It might be chaos out there or chaos in here – either way it is all the same.  We must drop in – be with ourselves, sense, feel and know the chaos so that we can know true love.  There is no other way around.  There is only one way through – it is through the fires, and this is where our spirits ascend as the rising above.  This only happens through complete experience of the oneness that already exists within you. 

This is the key you have been waiting for, it is your life work waiting for you to turn the key.  Now open the door and walk through.  You must begin where you are.  And with everything that comes up you connect with love and send it back to the nothingness that it came from which is everything.  This is your work, this is your way, therefore you came here…to experience and be love…that’s all there is anyway, so let’s begin.  Over and over again…that’s all we do.  Begin again and again and again until we always know in all ways that love is all we are.  This is the circle of life.


The Shaman and The Lightworker –  This Saturday Morning, October 2nd – A transcending journey in the woods and onto the beach.  Come with an open heart ready to resolve and release and learn how to create the miraculous in your life.  More here… 

October 17th – The Sandwich Connection For Athletes – 3-6pm
What does a sandwich have to do with teenage athletes?  Everything!  IntuitLove is teaming up with More Guts More Glory Coaching for a 3 Hour retreat specifically designed for teenage women athletes to empower and enhance their game on and off the field.  We are empowering these young women to become the masters of their own life through a specifically designed SANDWICH program that will help them be on purpose with their lives and become their highest potential. See more here and SIGN UP YOUR DAUGHTER TODAY… Limited spots are left.  

Personal 1:1 Energy Clearing Sessionsmeant to Transcend all limitations in thoughts and belief systems which effect the physical, emotional, and mental fields… helping in all areas of life.  
Schedule a personal session with me and we will dive into rising above the perceived mountains in your way… even if you don’t know where to begin or how to get there… we will figure that out together and get you where you want to be.  
MORE HERE & CONTACT ME to schedule today.  

The Powerless Grip of Judgement

One of the greatest reasons we are held back from creating the life of our dreams or rising above limitation and feeling connected… or soaring through our heart’s love for freedom and elation is the deep-seated root causes of judgement.  Our world is so deeply embedded in judgment after judgement that this is the very thing that keeps us doing the same things where we are repeatedly.  We see feel and know only our thoughts of the mind that are limited by what we reference in the outside world, our school’s knowledge, and the inner world of the heart that is suffocating under judgment after judgement keeping us suppressed where we are.  We have no room for expansion because our thoughts beliefs and ideas about life are all based on judgements and then bring us right back to all our self-pronounced limitations. 

Even knowledge from this book is a form of judgement.  Knowledge in the math and sciences are all formed in judgement.  They are ideas and discoveries that someone wrote down, taught them, and inferred what they mean.  All passed down in judgements made up about who and what they are, how they came about, and the impact they made on our world.  The classrooms fill our heads with judgments of right and wrong of up and down, dark and light, left and right.  There is nothing that we do in our schools and life in general to speak of, or teach of, or feel of, within the confounds of neutrality.  Children are taught to judge right versus wrong in math, science, history, language, and composition.  Even in relationships.  Teaching them the right way to speak to someone, address someone, be with someone, and especially if they want to do well in school and the world that they must presume themselves a certain way.  All based on a judgement that if we don’t do something a particular way, if we don’t keep ourselves safe or learning in the right way that society tells us to be that on every level we will have subconsciously failed at life.  We must think a certain way, we must learn a certain way, we must go through the steps in life in this way not that way…all to protect our children from doing the wrong thing so that they don’t do anything outside of the normal.  What is normal?  What is this thing that we call normal and why do we invest so much time and energy in being normal, fitting in, afraid and fearful that if we don’t, we will somehow in some way not be ok?  As if we will fall on our backs and never be able to get up again because we just do not understand, and we must be saved.  What is that and why is that present in our lives? 

It is so present everywhere.  All the reasons and passions and evolutions and transcendence that needs to happen is happening.  Otherwise, you would not be reading this book.  We need heart-full leaders.  People composed in imagination and discovery and invested in evolving and shifting this world into higher forms of consciousness that sees everything from above at a hawk’s eye view, is not afraid to soar, and sees so keenly what is truly unfolding and intuitively flies and flows knowing that every person place and thing has a higher purpose. We are all learning to become our true selves at any age. 

Think of the child that falls not once, twice, or three times as they are learning to walk.  They fall over and over again.  They cry repeatedly.  It is in their allowance and intuitive knowing that they sense and feel an urge to crawl, to walk, to move, to run.  Even the child that seems to have some type of disability that prevents them from learning these stages has the urge to evolve, transform, and become their own version of a uniquely creative and connected being ready to elevate this world.  Why is it easy to accept that a normal child with normal circumstances will go through the stages to walking & running but it is so difficult to imagine the same for a child with a disability that ‘prevents’ them from walking?  Or even a child who is in horrible environmental surroundings?  Why is it that we presume we know and understand what will happen next for them before they are even given the chance?  Why is it we believe so much in the probable and we leave out the possible? 

Because we have been taught this way.

Because fear in all stages of our life has showed us this.  Because we have learned from our knowledge, schools, our parents, our society and our religions of what not to do and we have placed our entire soul into this realm of existence that has brought our Earth to ultimate limitation.  Yes.  We did this.  We contributed to where we are right now.  Each one of us that has buried our noses in fear and refused to look about into the world than anything more than limitation.  We did this.  Once we admit our own individual falls, we can sooner accept that this is not a judgement but an acceptance and a surrender to the intuitive knowing within our hearts that there is another way, because there is.  The only way we can rise above what is happening is through going within, questioning everything arising within ourselves and then practicing over and over again the art of going neutral.  Neutrality is not letting go and laying down to do nothing.  We must be in neutrality to know our heart centered self.  This requires silence.  Silence of the mind that loves judgement and opening of the heart that is all accepting of ourselves first and then our worlds.  Silence knows that this is the only place that we can recreate our lives from within.  It is the only place that can discern for ourselves that our individual interactions can be much more powerful than anything that has ever been done before that is based in force or revolutions.  Silence is the ‘golden ticket’, that Charlie and the Chocolate Factory Surprise, that comes from an honest heartfelt connection that desires goodness for all.  It knows and it discerns the heart filled path that ‘getting there’ happens only by ‘being where you are’ and this only happens when we merge with ourselves, transcend all of our own perceived limitations, and elevate through to the oneness of ourselves.  If each individual, if each child, if each being, was to see how their individual purpose and strength coming from the heart was unique for individual after individual then they would finally be able to trust in their own self-discovery.  If they were allowed to discover this on their own through countless ways of our own self-acceptance, we would all collectively shift the world.  It is only through our own transformations at an individual level that we can fall and fall again within ourselves.  It is here where we are safe to feel our own internal pains and sufferings so that we can elevate our lives.  In so doing, we rise out of all judgements we have ever been taught or soaked up like an unconscious sponge and then squeeze these out in discernment of what we want to fill our world.  It is through the silencing of the negative mind, the negative thoughts, and the limited ideas that we can truly sense and know the fluttering and desires of our spirit that are naturally filled with inspiration to thrive and collectively embrace our world.  As a child intuitively desires to walk, a bird intuitively desires to fly, and a caterpillar intuitively becomes a butterfly, each one of us already intuitively knows how to live through the heart. 

Lesson – The Powerless Grip of Judgement

Release the judgement in your own individual world and we collectively raise the heart filled consciousness of the entire world.  We are the heart of consciousness intuitively knowing how to transcend and transform. 

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